Girl With One Track Mind (Sexhunters)
I Fell in Love on the Northern Line
Dead Man's Shoes
by Dani Carbery
Why am I here?
What do I do? What if
One of them says ''Miss,
I've just done a poo?''
They come in the room
Clinging to Dad
Seventeen tiny limpets
I can't be that bad?!
But I'm
huge - I'm
scary - I'm
A girl with short hair
I'm selfish
Uncaring - so
Why do I care?
I'm an actor Goddammit
Grab the bull by the horns
I start bouncing around
They, collectively, yawn.
Right - OK. . . I know what we'll do
All kids love an old fashioned
Trip to the zoo!
A circle is formed
Start with me, one by one
We'll do Favourite Animals
Won't that be fun?
(aha, this could help me
remember their names
For example - ''from now on
You are Giraffe James''
A parrot, a tiger
A huge great white shark
Frogs and tarantulas
Bob-monsters who bark!?
Getting carried away
They scratch and they bite
Tarantulas kill and
Bob-monsters fight
I'm losing control
Of them - no - of me!
Of logic of reason
And of P.C.
I don't bite my tongue
I gnaw it clean off -
you can't tell a six year old
to ''Just Fuck Right Off''!
Deep breath ''hold hands''
''shh, we're only half way,
the rest of the circle
has something to say.
A snake with five legs,
A fruitbat which burps,
James - please say Giraffe,
OK - wallaby works.
We all turn to the next
His name? Not a clue
He's all arms and legs,
His hair - ginger hue.
He's looking around,
the ceiling, the floor -
''that pillar's quite interesting
hmm yeh, and that door''
Establishing contact
With this gangly boy
Seems nigh on impossible
Whatever the ploy
Silence descends
I say: ''What's your name
And your creature of choice
In this wonderful game?''
Not looking at me,
He clumsily talks,
Slowly, ''My name is Simon,
I like cats,'' he retorts.
The remaining few animals
Spring into action
It's a wonder the pig
Didn't end up in traction.
Bell rings! - It's over
They're alive. . . so am I
Come back next week?
I'd rather die.
Cup of tea with the Head
She turns round to say
''I was lurking about
watching today,
''whatever you did,
I've just got to tell you. . .''
''Get ready,'' I thought
''They're going to arrest you''
''Simon's autistic,
should have told you as much,
sorry about that,
but you must have the touch.''
Turns out that the first words
He spoke in three years
Of coming to class
In front of his peers
Were ''My name is Simon''
And then - ''I like cats''.
Well, I'll try it next week,
Who'd've thought that?
Dani Carbery
Posted: September 2006. Copyright: Dani Carbery.