Girl With One Track Mind (Sexhunters)
I Fell in Love on the Northern Line
Saturday Night at the J H Tavern
The Diet
The scales tip,
Tummy wobbles,
Hamster cheeks
Betray the trouble,
Getting chubby,
Life's taken its toll,
Too many curries,
Booze out of control.
Cutting back ain't easy,
But a diet it must be,
Tandoori usurped by salad,
Lager by detox tea,
I flog my guts out at the gym
To lose a pound or two,
And put it back on straight away,
Binge-drinking like a fool.
The good things in life are there for me,
They must not go to waste,
Sheer vanity triggered this,
In the mirror my fat face.
Will power have I not,
I could eat a shire horse
And drink beer, wine, spirits - the lot,
The diet's doomed of course!